Bonnaroo Day 1: The waiting and the sickness

Hour 1 of waiting, thinking this is the end of the line

It’s been awhile since Bonnaroo, but I’m finally up to recounting the weekend since my flu has passed and I’m no longer scared of Bonnaroo and the physical pain it brought me afterwards.

Oh day one…I’ll never forget the way you pissed me off.  After driving in the car for 11 hours we finally make it to Manchester, TN where all your drug dreams come true for 4 days out of the year.  I didn’t have many drug dreams, but I had a few that were ready to become reality.  Reality, however, settled in much too fast when we saw the line of cars.  The exit we were planning on getting off at was blocked by police, who put up road signs saying to go 10 exits up to get to Bonnaroo.  I drove the Jeep 70mph, not letting people pass me because that would mean our tent site would be that much more terrible.  The entire drive to get to that magic exit was unsettling because, going in the other direction, was a LOOOOOOOOOOOONG line of cars that did not end…and we were going right to the end of it, barreling down at 70mph. 

On the way down to the exit, we saw a convertible with its top down, letting us see the two blonde, sun-loving girls inside…one with her feet on the dash.  I got right behind them as to ensure our tent was next to theirs (don’t hate and say it’s a ridiculous idea because of the way they break up the cars later on in line…I told the police we were with them…unbeknownst to them.  that’s right parents, we’re out there).  Anyway, it was a fruitless journey behind the blonde-filled convertible, because they stopped for gas and we kept going.

We get to our place in line and the truth settles in – we weren’t going to setup camp for a few hours at least.  Thunderstorm rolls in and I see a lot of people on their phones when I get the idea to start searching Twitter for “Bonnaroo” to pass the time and maybe get news updates on the lines.  That was one of the best ideas I had all weekend.  I used to think Twitter was just full of mundane status updates or a way to drive traffic to your site – it’s not…when used properly.  I was following the tweets of a group of 70 “solo-rooers” (people who went to Bonnaroo alone) find eachother and make their own tent city of loners.  People made Twitter games like who could find the best license plate.  It was chock-full of news, games and pictures…and a great way to pass time in the car for 5 hours.  For the rest of the weekend, whenever there wasn’t anything to do, somebody always had a suggestion on Twitter.

So we arrive, setup camp (I notice I’m really dizzy while setting up the camp…stay tuned) and head into the tent city by the RV city to find my friend’s friend who had setup their place with a Bills and Sabres flag, which should have been easy to find.  We even had an intersection to navigate to – “2nd and 4th”.  Couldn’t find it for the life of us.  Navigating around Bonnaroo’s tent cities is ridiculous, but at least there were tons of things to look at…and we were offered ecstasy at least 4 times.  By the way, when somebody asks you “want to buy some dual pistols?”, don’t stop and ask what they are for your own curiousity…your question will get answered by a 20 minute explanation.  We get to the camp we were looking for, drink more and head into Centeroo, the concert area.  It’s damn hot already…I’m sweating, I’m dehydrated, I’m a little drunk and I have no idea what I’m doing because I’m just following people.

Inside, I don’t get any food because I’m anxious and get two beers instead (Irish handcuffs!).  So begins the long decline of my overall health.  We watch a little bit of The Knux and I can tell that I’m getting really drunk, sick and dizzy.  I should have drank water.  I SHOULD HAVE DRANK WATER.  Booze is for the night, folks.  Standing around at some show (it didn’t matter to me at the time), I watch my friend and his friend’s attempt to pick up two girls who’re waiting for the next band to start.  They weren’t having much luck and one of the girls starts talking to me about Ben Harper, their old music and the new group he’s playing with.  I should have really got into the conversation and locked into this girl but I was a little sick and didn’t talk much after Ben Harper.  Live and learn, I guess…it’s always better to be hydrated and happy, than drunk and sick.  Not to mention that we had been up for 23 hours straight, sitting in a Jeep before we decided to drink.  I left the show, got another beer and muttered something to my friend about going on an “ultimate drug adventure” to which he declined and wanted me to stay in the concert area.  Way too drunk, sick and tired…I hated Bonnaroo that night – very loud and crowded and all I wanted to do was take it easy.

I left the concert area alone with no phone and no plans besides getting extremely buzzed.  Enter thunderstorm.  Within a few seconds of the storm, I was completely drenched…trying to find my way back to our tent to get out of the rain.  I drudged through mud going down a few wrong “streets” for awhile when one of the taxis asked me if I needed a ride.  I did need a ride, but I didn’t know where I lived so the ride would have been useless.  I declined, got on the main road and finally found my way back to the tent…got into some dry clothes and prayed the tent didn’t blow down from the wind and rain.

I woke up a few hours later with the feeling that I’m going to throw up soon.  You know the feeling, when you know you should throw up but are trying to hold it back…thinking happy thoughts.  I do remember asking my friend if he knew of any bag in the tent so I didn’t have to publicly puke with my head outside the tent.  A few minutes later, I didn’t care and was furiously looking for the zipper of the tent door…my head got a few inches out of the door and I let loose.  I felt great afterwards and went back to bed.  I woke up 20 minutes later with the same feeling and same result.  This process of waking, throwing up and sleeping went on over the next several hours until it became so painstakingly hot and humid that I had to remove myself from the oven that used to be our tent.  The sun was up and I couldn’t stop puking until I got all the way down to stomach acid.  I was completely dehydrated, hungover and my mouth reeked of stomach acid.  I considered going to the medical tent but didn’t know if I could make it.  My legs were like jelly.

I spent the morning cleaning up with baby wipes, drinking insane amounts of water, a bottle of gatorade and cooked some real food for breakfast.  I vowed to not drink until nighttime and slammed water all day.  Feeling much better, we walked into Centeroo for day two.